Making My List and Checking it Twice

This year my family is fleeing the frigid Midwest to spend a week of the Christmas holiday with us in Tampa. Having my parents and brother come to my house for the holidays is going to be a totally new experience, and I couldn't be more excited. However, at the same time, I’m getting more and more terrified as the days pass by because I’m attempting to pull-off a “Traditional Burkett Christmas” on my own for the very first time. This is a daunting task that involves ensuring traditions are upheld by creating a warm holiday home, preparing a ridiculous amount of food, filling stockings, stocking-up on libations, and having a plethora of homemade candies, cookies, and pies available at all times--to name a few. I’m becoming increasingly anxious because there are only a limited number of days left for decorating, menu planning, cooking, baking, cleaning, and wrapping presents...not to mention shopping for everything! I don’t know how people do this every year! I have never really felt an exorbitant amount of stress during the holidays—I guess due to the fact that my mother has always been the one bearing the burden. Now that I’ve crossed over to the dark side of hosting the festivities--I can see how some people have mental breakdowns during this time of year. So, in preparation, I’ve started my Holiday Checklist:

Decorate tree and hang stockings- check!
Put up outdoor lights on house- check!
Watch The Christmas Story at least twice - _____
Christmas music/all day/every day- check!
Freak out because I don't have enough napkin rings- check!
Burn a batch of Christmas cookies- ____
Ruin at least one more batch of Christmas cookies- _____
Eat almost the entire good batch of cookies to feel better - ____
Start stressing about what gifts to buy for everyone- check!
Discuss and agree upon a “no gifts” policy this year- check!
See shoes that I can’t live without and propose a “Just don’t go all-out” policy- check!
Throw self into the masses of stressed shoppers- check!
Get flipped-off by a stressed holiday shopper- check!
Become stressed because the stressed shoppers are stressful- check!
Decide to buy gifts online- check!
Bite off all fingernails- check!
Drink too much “holiday cheer”- _____
Suffer Dante’s-fourth-circle-of-Hell-hangover - _____
Decide that New Year’s resolution will be to never drink again- _____
Start a small fire on the mantle with decorative holiday candles and Christmas cards -____
Pray that this won’t be remembered as “The Year Keenan Ruined Christmas” - check!
Walk outside in December to sunshine and warm 78-degree breezes - check!
Deep-breathe and vow to stop stressing for the remainder of the holidays and enjoy every moment - check!
Remember that it’s really all about family anyway- check!
Decide that this Christmas is going to be the best one yet - check!